12/11/2023 0 Comments Carl rogers reflective listening![]() Greek philosopher Epictetus said: ‘We have two ears and one mouth so that we can listen twice as much as we speak.’ This is a good listening-to-responding ratio. Sitting with your arms crossed can be seen as a barrier, as can waving your arms around. Sometimes, leaning forward towards the client indicates how intently you are listening to them. Being relaxed and comfortable allows you to focus on your client and not on yourself. The way you sit can give important clues into how much you are attending. Do be aware that in some cultures, it is seen as disrespectful to look someone in the eye. Try to be as natural as possible when doing this and avoid looking as if you are staring at them. This shows that you are paying attention and are giving your full attention to them. The best way of showing someone you are listening to them is by making eye contact. Then simply my presence is releasing and helpful. When I am at my best…when I am closest to my inner, intuitive self, when I am somehow in touch with the unknown in me, when perhaps I am in a slightly altered state of consciousness in the relationship, then whatever I seem to so seems full of healing. In a paper published in 1986, Rogers described another characteristic in addition to the six necessary and sufficient conditions, which he termed ‘presence’:
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